2003-05-15 9:54 a.m.
armenian strife

hello.

There are some things you don't say in the San Francisco Of Modern Art. If someone points at "Red Liz" By Andy Warhol and asks you what you think, it is not polite to loudly say "OH MY GOD! IT LOOKS LIKE DR. FRANK-N-FURTER!!"

When shown a black-on-black canvas, the appropriate reply is an appreciative sigh, or an "ooh". Saying "Wow, you people are idiots, have you seen the exhibit hanging over there? It is bottles on a wire! SO conceptual!"

Finally when sitting and admiring the wonderment that is a Mark Rothko painting enjoy it in silence. People will get mad if you say "oh god. it's orange!"

yes, i did learn all of these the hard way. I have been thought not to mock modern art. Fuck.

-Mark

For bonus annoyance points: Walk up to any painting of or by Frida Kahlo and loudly exclaim "WOW!!! SHE LOOKS NOTHING LIKE SALMA HAYEK!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER?"

whore's hustle / hustler's whore